Simbly Bored

It's me that's bored enough to blog. The posts are interesting enough.

Goddess or Agony Aunt? October 20, 2009

Filed under: Randomness, The Way I Say It, Through a Woman's Eyes — The Goddess @ 2:57 pm

Here’s a comment I recently received:

Dear Agony Aunt,

How should I decide if I am ready to spend the rest of my hopefully long life with someone I met a couple of times when I take months, sometimes years, to choose my friends?!

What would I ask her? “What are your hobbies? Who’s your fav actor? What’s your fav movie? So, will you marry me?”

How would I buy her a surprise wedding gift when I dont know her taste?

How would I romance an almost stranger? And now it’s almost scientifically proven by Nature that I have no luck with a love marriage! Am I going die single? :(

Dear Distressed Desi Male,

Unless the most important decisions of your life revolve around watching movies, building your DVD collection and planning how to use your spare room, may I suggest you ask more meaningful questions such as what marriage means to her, whether she considers an arranged marriage a last resort and what plans and/or dreams she has for her future?

May I also gently point out that we no longer live in the dark ages and you could possibly write her an email or two even if you can’t meet her in person?

And Beta, correct me if I’m wrong. When you run around dating that cute girl you only met that one time at a party, are you not romancing a stranger till you decide you love her?

Louve Shouve is all fine Beta, but you must remember, arranged marriage is our Sanskriti. It is our Baratiya Sabhyata. It is also our last resort.

With Best Wishes for a Happy and Prosperous Married Life.

Your Friendly Agony Aunty

ps: Diamonds are the best surprise


to all readers – please note the sarcasm…

 

Accepting Applications April 24, 2009

For the post of onsite best friend.

Requirements:

Must willingly spend time with me instead of succumbing to academic, social or personal pressure and spending time for the sake of future gain.

Must not complain when I call in the middle of the night with intellectual, emotional, philosophical, nonsensical or whimsical demands.

Must be able to appreciate the concept of a sense of space and gauge moods.

Must consume occasional doses of gyan with a teaspoon of salt (or preferred seasoning).

Must be capable of sustaining intelligent conversation not centered around “Academics” or “People Around Us” or constantly compare life with “The Way it Was”.

Must understand that a friend is not someone who fills up time when the significant other can’t be there.

Must live within walking distance of my apartment.

Perks:

Unwavering loyalty

A shoulder to cry on

An ear to crib to

A person who cares

Endless conversations

Amazing coffee!

Closing Comments:

Individuals holding this post in the past will be able to provide further inputs regarding the post and perks

 

Caution! Web Ahead! March 23, 2009

Filed under: Blogging, The Way I Say It — The Goddess @ 1:13 pm

Keeping a clean web presence and checking what is said by and about you online is evidently about as important as resume building. Recruiters would not be particulary impressed by racist or judgmental comments on your blog, pictures of you drinking or drunk posted on Facebook and of course, they would raise an eyebrow when they read a bad quote attributed to you on a friends blog or an ancient newspaper crawl (remember the “teen-speak” columns all those newspapers do that you might have featured in long, long ago?). And lets face it, the recruiter wouldn’t want any potential interviewees seeing something compromising about them either.

There is a new tale about how to lose your job in 140 characters or less circulating around about a real life story of someone who published a rather unfortunate tweet. The post I refer to above also talks about the need to be very, very cautious when posting something on the internet (like this blog post, for instance). Everything you post on blogs, twitter, facebook and anywhere else will come back and haunt you 10 years from today thanks to search and archives.

There are, of course, some things that you just don’t do. Posting a questionable comment about a job you managed to land (no matter what the economic landscape) is one of them. It’s again, not the smartest thing in the world to express extremes of opinion or say nasty things about people very publicly.

With the advent of social media, however, I think it’s become increasingly difficult to draw the line between what is should concern employers and what should not. Read this story about someone who posted unflattering comments about a city where he was going to make an important presentation. The tweet was probably in bad taste but I wonder if it was directly relevant to his professional life. Surely a person is entitled to like, dislike or absolutely hate a city he lands in and tweet about it!

What about someone named in a nasty goodbye email that finds its way onto the internet? What if a friend, in a moment of anger posts something nasty about you on their blog, then deletes it but the cached version lingers forever? What if a picture of you snapped at a party finds its way onto someone elses facebook album? What if you express a strong opinion on an issue and it gets pulled up – out of context – years from today? What if you forward something harmless to a friend who, in all good faith finds the stuff interesting, posts it on her blog and attributes the forward to you? What if you tweeted about an article that was once considered rather harmless but is now controversial? (imagine how a decade or two from today we’ll be really feeling the effects of global warming and low oil reserves and a record of all positive reviews of Hummers and SUV’s and their authors will be available)

Just because everything is searchable and archived and tagged and labelled, does it mean that we should actually search and probe and draw inferences from every piece of information available about a person online? Should a person be judged by what the web shows about him than what we see, hear and experience in a conversation? And finally, how relevant is most of the stuff thrown up in a web search to one’s professional life? I think it’s time someone came up with guidelines in that regard…