Sometimes, when you check your mail after a long time, you find some mails that jolt you.
Mails that come from unexpected quarters. Agreed, you’re just one in the entire train of people who were written to, but still, you realise that you’re still a long forgotten, trailing yet undiscarded bogie in that express.
Q: Why is that so unpleasant?
A: It’s not. It’s just a little jolt.
Q: Then What is the problem?
A: Nothing, really…
Leads to nowhere. You’re still upset by something. But you know you can’t say it aloud without feeling stupid.
Ok, I admit it, there are some pepople who I still think about often enough, but feel stupid for still hanging on to memories of.
I also admit that there are people who I can’t really understand. Never really understood, but tried in my own weird way to understand, and failed.
There are also people who tried understanding me, but who failed miserably at it.
Most often, the two sets overlap.
But there is a third set. A small set. The set who continue to jolt and will always do so no matter how many miles may separate our hearts. These are the people who were offered, but never took. Who knew, but didn’t admit. People who cared, but never said. And people who pushed and then walked away. People who you let get away with, all because you cared.
People who… People who you never lose hope about and always think you could have done just that little more for to make them look back at what they walked away from.
In short, the people who’re hardest to get over because somewhere deep inside, you just dont want to admit you failed.
This post’s dedicated to all those people. (In case you’re reading). I regret everything I ever did to hurt you. Just wanted to say this in case something happens. Life is short.
ps: i get morbid everytime i look at my latest medical record… please excuse.